Post by Seraphyna on Nov 9, 2008 13:25:40 GMT -5
I thought I'd share what I remember of the events that led to me being incarnated here...it's a bit emotional for me to discuss (not to mention the only part of my celestial existance I remember in such detail) so be kind...
Seraphyna was (is) my name, well my name in a form pronounceable by human vocal cords...I took it as my confirmation name when I was still being forced into Catholicism by my parents....anyway, I am a Balancer (see topic: Balancers for details)…and here’s a tidbit on my celestial form proper: I was somewhere between 5'6-5'9'' ish tall. Long curly (think banana curls) red hair I think my eyes were some version of grey or violet, though I'm not sure which, and lack a pupil. I was usually wearing really light and flowly dresses...mostly of the light grey/silver variety, though I also have memories of me in a brilliant white/silver chainmail flowy dress-like armor thing. I had either one or three sets of wings. If one pair, they changed; if three sets, I had one pair of each of the following: pale grey feathered wings, dark leather "draconic or demon" wings, and a pair that was a hybrid of the two. As for my other forms I’m aware of thus far…one is a tiger occasionally with flaming paws and shoulderblades. The other is a lioness-dragon hybrid type of gargoyle. The final one is mermaid, same hair, cerulean eyes (again without a pupil), scales on my shoulders, and a blue-ish tail.
Anyhow, I was betrothed, but never loved the mate that was chosen for me (as was the point of betrothals) and fell in love with a being named Sepherious. The other man knew that he could do nothing to sever, prevent, or cease our love and stepped aside, still in love with me himself, but knowing that he didn't have the remotest of chances. There was nothing he could do short of destroying Sepherious to get me back. Thus, I knew that I would have to protect Serpherious from the other Balancers. I knew that they would most likely seek to destroy him in order to “save” me from jeopardizing my neutrality. So I sought to gain as much power as possible. The more my power grew, the more I lost sight of myself…of what I was, what my duty was. I wanted to be akin with the gods so that I could keep him safe…it was that kind of love, the deep eternal kind you’ll do anything to protect. The cliché really is true…power does corrupt. I lost sight of myself entirely…
…and, I was a fool. I ended up cheating on Sepherious with a being named Vandon. I never forgave myself, seeing what this quest for power had turned me into. Knowing that no one could destroy me, save the Source Hirself (who wouldn’t because I made my choice and thus had to do what I had to do) I banished myself from a celestial existence.
How? Well I remember consuming myself in white hot energy for what I thought would be an eternity of conscious death, but instead got me incarnated here on a learning vacation I assume to get “love out of my system or something”…like that’s possible.
Soon after I “left”, Sepherious and my betrothed were in a great battle where Sepherious was defeated and imprisoned in an emerald talisman. Everyone involved has, at this point, been reincarnated, destined to play out our roles in something of the human “apocalypse” or some kind of great change, which is apparently closer at hand than I ever thought it could be.
Once my memories came back to me (mind you they're still incomplete and a smidge fuzzy), I was devastated. I blame myself for everything that happened, as well I should right? Sepherious may not even know who he is, but he’s here…I know it. I feel he’s been in my dreams, which have a thread of their own poking around.
My betrothed and Vandon are around somewhere and have more power and complete memories than I do...which may be a dangerous development...a few years ago I was in touch with both of them via IM, but have since basically lost touch for better or worse.
That's about all I've got. The memories I have are quite disjointed, a name and a picture coming in here or there needing to be placed together until it's all figured out. I've done two past life visualizations and have seen myself standing atop a waterfall in a vast city with tall buildings that are silver spirals (The Silver City). I always think this is a little interesting side note: I have a birthmark (it was much bigger at birth) over my chest where the energy began when I tried to destroy/banish myself long ago...I was born with a big red mark on my chest, it's now very very small....but there you have it.
Just thought it was time to type out what I have, given in very little detail, in the way of my last memories as a Balancer before my incarnation here.
Seraphyna was (is) my name, well my name in a form pronounceable by human vocal cords...I took it as my confirmation name when I was still being forced into Catholicism by my parents....anyway, I am a Balancer (see topic: Balancers for details)…and here’s a tidbit on my celestial form proper: I was somewhere between 5'6-5'9'' ish tall. Long curly (think banana curls) red hair I think my eyes were some version of grey or violet, though I'm not sure which, and lack a pupil. I was usually wearing really light and flowly dresses...mostly of the light grey/silver variety, though I also have memories of me in a brilliant white/silver chainmail flowy dress-like armor thing. I had either one or three sets of wings. If one pair, they changed; if three sets, I had one pair of each of the following: pale grey feathered wings, dark leather "draconic or demon" wings, and a pair that was a hybrid of the two. As for my other forms I’m aware of thus far…one is a tiger occasionally with flaming paws and shoulderblades. The other is a lioness-dragon hybrid type of gargoyle. The final one is mermaid, same hair, cerulean eyes (again without a pupil), scales on my shoulders, and a blue-ish tail.
Anyhow, I was betrothed, but never loved the mate that was chosen for me (as was the point of betrothals) and fell in love with a being named Sepherious. The other man knew that he could do nothing to sever, prevent, or cease our love and stepped aside, still in love with me himself, but knowing that he didn't have the remotest of chances. There was nothing he could do short of destroying Sepherious to get me back. Thus, I knew that I would have to protect Serpherious from the other Balancers. I knew that they would most likely seek to destroy him in order to “save” me from jeopardizing my neutrality. So I sought to gain as much power as possible. The more my power grew, the more I lost sight of myself…of what I was, what my duty was. I wanted to be akin with the gods so that I could keep him safe…it was that kind of love, the deep eternal kind you’ll do anything to protect. The cliché really is true…power does corrupt. I lost sight of myself entirely…
…and, I was a fool. I ended up cheating on Sepherious with a being named Vandon. I never forgave myself, seeing what this quest for power had turned me into. Knowing that no one could destroy me, save the Source Hirself (who wouldn’t because I made my choice and thus had to do what I had to do) I banished myself from a celestial existence.
How? Well I remember consuming myself in white hot energy for what I thought would be an eternity of conscious death, but instead got me incarnated here on a learning vacation I assume to get “love out of my system or something”…like that’s possible.
Soon after I “left”, Sepherious and my betrothed were in a great battle where Sepherious was defeated and imprisoned in an emerald talisman. Everyone involved has, at this point, been reincarnated, destined to play out our roles in something of the human “apocalypse” or some kind of great change, which is apparently closer at hand than I ever thought it could be.
Once my memories came back to me (mind you they're still incomplete and a smidge fuzzy), I was devastated. I blame myself for everything that happened, as well I should right? Sepherious may not even know who he is, but he’s here…I know it. I feel he’s been in my dreams, which have a thread of their own poking around.
My betrothed and Vandon are around somewhere and have more power and complete memories than I do...which may be a dangerous development...a few years ago I was in touch with both of them via IM, but have since basically lost touch for better or worse.
That's about all I've got. The memories I have are quite disjointed, a name and a picture coming in here or there needing to be placed together until it's all figured out. I've done two past life visualizations and have seen myself standing atop a waterfall in a vast city with tall buildings that are silver spirals (The Silver City). I always think this is a little interesting side note: I have a birthmark (it was much bigger at birth) over my chest where the energy began when I tried to destroy/banish myself long ago...I was born with a big red mark on my chest, it's now very very small....but there you have it.
Just thought it was time to type out what I have, given in very little detail, in the way of my last memories as a Balancer before my incarnation here.
